Friday, June 20, 2014

In my shadow.

It's lot a harder writing in an almost-daily fashion nowadays, when I belong to people. It's a lot easier to admit to failings or struggles when you're an individual, and not a mom or a girlfriend. Or, at least it is for me.

I have the hardest time writing about being a "recovered" eating-disordered person. (In quotes, because it's still running in place to stay recovered, sometimes.) It's not even about shame, or anything like that, but more about the fact that there still remains in my mind the fear of scrutiny, the fear of failure of an idea of me, someone else's idea of me.

I look forward to a future when I have slain that shadow.